Pamela

My name is Pamela and I would consider myself a fortunate individual that has had several successes in life and many memories of fun times throughout the years. I have had my share of sorrows too, but none that affected me for too long. I was always able to be resilient…able to bounce back. That was until I was faced with my own personal battle with the big “C’” aka cancer. Today, I am a cervical cancer survivor trying to keep cancer at bay and live life to the fullest, because you just never know what tomorrow might bring. This is my story and I know that it is real because I live it every day. I don’t claim to be an expert, but I am experienced in the life of a cancer patient. Cancer does not define me, but I definitely define what cancer means to me. I consider myself strong, yet oh so vulnerable at the same time. I am also knowledgeable, yet somewhat in the dark. Cancer is a part of my everyday existence, but it does not consume all of my waking moments. It is something that I fear, but also something that intrigues me with its ability to morph to suit its own needs. My journey is similar to other cancer survivors, but is also unique to me. My cancer story began years before I was even diagnosed. I had been having some “weird” periods and occasionally bleeding between periods. I chalked it up to being on the pill and under tremendous amounts of stress. I was going through a divorce and thought I of course had heard of cervical cancer, but I really did not know great details about it even thoug that my body was just a little out of whack because of it all. Initially, cancer never even crossed my mind.h I am a health care professional. I work with children and am definitely not an oncology expert. As we all know, “below the belt” topics are the first topics that people do not want to share with others, so I kept it to my self (except for my primary physician) and thought that it would get better, as the stress in my life decreased. I had consulted my physician and he thought that I might be having some hormone issues. Blood work was done and I was sent for a vaginal ultrasound to check out my ovaries. I was told that I had several ovarian cysts on both ovaries and was diagnosed with polycystic ovary disease. I told myself that was something that I could manage and my mind was put at ease that everything was going to be ok. I would find out later that there was also something seen in my uterine/cervix area that they questioned might be a fibroid or maybe something called a nabithian cyst. I was never told about that part of it, so I never questioned the doctor further about other possibilities. I was also reassured by the fact that I had a pap test and that it had come back negative. I was not tested for HPV and if by some small chance that I was…I was never told. I would not find out about the complete results of the first ultrasound until over a year later when I continued to have issues with unusual bleeding and was sent for a second ultrasound. Unfortunately, by then I had Stage 3 cervical cancer with lymph node involvement. The same year that I was finally diagnosed with cancer I had three negative pap smears. One thing that I have learned from all of this is to be very assertive with your own healthcare. If you do not think that something is right, get more than one opinion and continue to ask questions until somebody figures out what is going on. Not only had I seen my own doctor regarding my concern, I also saw his colleague and finally another doctor in the same clinic that immediately sent me to the hospital for a vaginal ultrasound after performing a pap smear and taking a look at my cervix. She said that she could see a mass on my cervix and that there was a good chance that it was cancer. I went for the ultrasound and remember how uncomfortable it was and knew at that point that something was terribly wrong. I was at home that evening with a good friend when I got a call at 8pm at night from the doctor. Doctors do not tend to call you after hours unless it is important. She said that she was very sorry to inform me that it was almost certain that I had cancer and that she wanted to send me to a specialist. I would end up seeing the oncologist within a few days and scheduled for exploratory surgery within a couple of weeks to see if it had spread to my bowel or bladder. I also went through a CT scan, MRI and a PET scan. It was determined that I had lymph nodes that had cancer in them and I also had a suspicious lung nodule that I was told was probably scar tissue from a respiratory infection. The oncologist was supportive and encouraging but did deliver the bad news that I would need to have external radiation 5 days a week for several months, chemotherapy once a week during that same period and internal radiation (brachytherapy) four times. I was in shock at first and then went into survivor mode. I was not going to let cancer take me down without a fight. I made it through treatment…not with flying colors, there were good days and dark days, but I made it!!! It gave me a new outlook on life and the desire to help other women facing cervical cancer. I did not know anyone with cervical cancer in the city that I lived, so I began researching cervical cancer on the web. I found a link for a conference in DC for cervical cancer survivors, but felt too fatigued and run down to go. I would attend the next conference in Los Angeles and there I would hear an inspirational speaker share her story of cervical cancer. I found her to be charismatic, knowledgeable, strong and motivating. That extraordinary woman was Tamika Felder. She would change my cancer experience for the better and give me the lift I needed to strive to help stop cervical cancer in its tracks. I am proud of Tamika and Friends and am more than happy to share my story on their website because they are an incredible group of women trying to save fellow women’s lives. I say let’s stand together and battle this horrible disease as a united front and be supportive of each other because it definitely makes a difference. Don’t be scared to share your own experience with cervical cancer, as it could save lives. Also, don’t let cancer define you, be who you truly are despite of it!!!